the end.

so freshmen year has officially concluded with the last paper an hour ago. I was so stressed last night i couldnt sleep. wth. first time in America. NOOB.


I don't really know if I'm in the mood for a concluding thought-type-thing.



I just want to thank God for being omnipresent in my life.
Watching over me for the past year despite my iniquities.


despite my lack of faith
despite my aloofness in this relationship with him
despite my selfishness in putting myself first
despite slipping away countless times.



and he showers upon me health
a church that feels so much like home
friends to support me
blessings upon blessings upon blessings



It's end of chapter 1 of 3 in Illinois.


I want to:
1. Eat chicken rice
2. Mambo
3. Go to Azarh and sit and do nothing
4. Play poker with the GEPs
5. Go to S-11 and do nothing

it's funny

so college begins and I thought one really weird observation was how time kind of changes. That is, the start of a new 'period' doesn't happen on Dec 31st 1159 onwards per se, it starts on ... May-ish. Because that's when the semester ends and we fly home. And as I continue writing chapter one of this fantasy I am living, I'm approaching the end as Chapter 2 patiently awaits.

I am blogging because I have FIVE days to study for 2 exams. That is too luxurious of a time-frame I believe. And since I have been the superdupermugger this whole semester, I don't think I need so much time, do I? Bottom line is.. EVERYONE ELSE HAS FINISHED THEIR EXAMS EXCEPT ME! I am sitting here in our secret room and staring out at a entity that seperates my current world from the outside. It's really just a window. But the analogy represets the disparity.

I reflect on the semester and think about the hours I've spent in the secret room. It's really just a study room but we call it the secret room to make our lives more interesting. Wow. Asians. Geniuses.

I think I am studying too much and that in itself is a failure; I didnt mean to travel 10,000 miles to come here to study so much. I could have done the same back home. I know I am a grades-whore but this is unacceptable!!!

Chapter 2 does begin on a fresh page, but Chapter 2 needs to begin with a different-minded author.

Let me get to the conclusion in the next few days before I fly, again.

Last 8 days in America! [Chapter 1 of 3]

So it's here, and today marks the beginning of very tumultuous period.

Sadly, the feeling is rather.. familiar? We've been studying way too much this semester. and this is the Zenith.

Well since a picture paints a thousand words. I have two thousand words to express so here are TWO wonderful pictures to express current moods:

Energy, Environment, Security: Can we have it all?

So Steven E. Kooonin swung by the quaint little champaign-urbana area in the middle of nowhere to grace this year's Beckman Lecture Series as the speaker. I must say being the Chief Scientist of BP does translate into some kind of pompousness.

Key take-aways:

1. Though intensity of carbon use has decreased in recent years, carbon emission levels have increased. In order to prevent the carbon concentration levels in the atmosphere to rise beyond 550-600(ppm) as current trends predict, reduction in emissions need to reach a factor of -2. However, imagine if China and/or India's emissions achieved parity with that of Japan (least emissions amongst the developed nations), global emissions will increase by 40%. So amidst concerns of global warming etc, I think something new he higlighted was the unhealthy carbon concentration level. Timeframe: within my lifetime. damn it.

2. Problems impeding energy solutions include scale, cost competition with alernatives, players with divergent interests and longevity of fixed asset investments. Behind the velvet curtains of the energy theatre, lies the backstage crew of economical forces and political will.

3. Education needs to penetrate not only the public, but policy makers and academia to infuse some sort of global direction, one that isn't misguided by personal interests and selfish gains.

This leads me to the whole new topic of behavioral economics which worships self-interests as describe in the book 'Mind of the Market'. Not a topic for today's discussion though.

i feel like Al Gore

GREEN RANTS!

So a while ago I was making noise about China (and risking the chance that 1/6 people in the WORLD might spit on me) and how they are chugging gasoline....

Now now, we have more company.

India has a seemingly insatiable appetite for cars, as shown in this traffic jam in a suburb of New Delhi,­ and the oil needed to run them, contributing to growing worldwide demand for petroleum.

Glorious

it began with a glorious day out. Though it was around 54F, but the sun was at its brightest, beaming. (think Tellytubby Sun).

And then the expression of God's love manifested through baptism today; teary-eyed, 4 souls in a public proclaimation, functioning both as a reminder and expression of the grace that flows in our lives.

And then the worship, relentless powerful week by week.

Everyone needs compassion

Love that’s never failing

Let mercy fall on me

Everyone needs forgiveness

The kindness of a Saviour

The hope of nations

Saviour

He can move the mountains

For my God is mighty to save

He is mighty to save

Forever

Author of salvation

He rose and conquered the grave

Jesus conquered the grave

I thank God for despite the lack of spiritual entities in my life now, week by week he sustains me with his powerful presence in his santuary at church. And every week I get reminded of how he is truly the author of salvation.

it's times like these

walking back to the dorm from classes yesterday...

weather was beautiful, the grass was bright green, the spring-time flowers are blooming, people laying on the quad. the breeze in my face, ipod in my ears - patrick park on the playlist... and all I can express is..

"AH.................." :)

It's times like these i thank God for everything and bringing me to America:)